Pushing Our Students

When is it good to push the students? How do I know the difference between pushing upward, that is, toward excellence they are capable of, or pushing them down by applying negative pressure? I think the difference depends on a few things. First, do I know each student well enough to know what they are capable of and therefore what I can push for that brings out the best in them? Or am I exerting force to get them to perform to my standards regardless of their interests and abilities? Secondly, do I care about my students enough to want them to do what they can do best, or do I care about the curriculum and my program, time commitments, results, etc? Thirdly, am I assertive enough to keep them accountable to their own competencies, or am I content to make them do what I want, using my authority to demand a performance that suits my needs?